new year, new cosy process

because there’s no wrong time to make changes

I’ve been thinking about 2024 goals for most of the month, like the rest of the internet, and it’s taken me a while to be able to come up with some. I started the year in a really deep depression pit so when I tried to think about “goals” and “wants” and other impossible things, the only thing that came to mind was “feel better” and that felt hard enough. But I’m (slowly) coming back out of the pit (🎵 and i’m doing not fine but better 🎵) and everything beyond the edge of the pit is starting to look a little clearer.

One of those things is: this newsletter! I did manage to think through some ins and outs for 2024 and one thing that kept coming up when I was thinking about priorities was The Cosy Process. I really want to prioritise this newsletter more, because it brings me a lot of joy to write and I love having a little space carved out online that’s just like back to basics old school LJ style vibes.

HOWEVER. One of the main features of Le Depresh for me is that I instinctively curl up in a tiny ball whenever anything wild like the idea of “sharing my feelings” or “having opinions” floats across my vicinity, so I spend a lot of time being like, I wish I could talk about xyz and even MORE time being like, absolutely not, what if people Know Me and then I have to go live in the woods and eat lichen and never emerge in daylight again.

But I identified a want (prioritise this newsletter) and I identified a fear to work on (writing this newsletter) and here we are, peering out of the woods like a concerned faun, if fauns had thoughts about books and mostly wanted a cup of tea. So I’m going for it! Doing the newsletter things I kept thinking about last year and talking myself out of! They are:

• I’ve turned on pledges - I’d really like to create an even smaller, cosier space that feels less daunting to me because of the extra privacy barrier, and ngl any little tip or support of my online work/presence would go a long way, so this is my first step towards that.

• Speaking of potential paid content, I was thinking about an informal, voicenote style mini… podcast? voicenote chat? I love listening to these on Patreon from some of my favourite creators and it feels like a gentle way to get more personal online.

• Not all the posts here are going to follow the same format! Sometimes I want to write longer pieces blog-style, and sometimes I want to stick to my beautiful lists, and both are okay

So! Thanks for sticking with me through the gap in newsletters, and this new year thought process 💕💕 It’s lovely to have you here.

And if you’re also in the depression pit and/or struggling with the concept of resolutions, just remember - there’s no wrong time to make changes. There’s no time limit on figuring out what you want. You can set little goals any time of year, or never, and either way that’s totally fine.

(some links in this email may be affiliate links. if you purchase anything via that link, I receive a small portion of the price with no extra cost to you! these links will be followed by a star like this * to make them clear.)

Full disclosure: I tried to write a favourite books of 2023 post before this and just completely stalled out. It felt too personal, somehow?? Even though I’ve never had trouble with that before? I think because some of the books I loved last year felt so personal, in a way that doesn’t often happen to me - like if I told people how much I loved them, they’d know something about me I wasn’t comfortable with them knowing. But then I want to share the books I love and the books that matter to me and part of what I want to do this year is share more when my instinct is to hedgehog ball away from everyone, so… I’m working on it 😅

That said, here are a few recent book purchases I’m looking forward to diving into soon! (links are affiliate links)

• Nine Liars* by Maureen Johnson

• The Fragile Threads of Power* by VE Schwab

• What the River Knows* by Isabel Ibanez

• Faebound* by Saara El-Arifi

And shoutout to The Alchemy of Moonlight* by David Ferrero, which I hadn’t heard of before but saw the cover and KNEW I had to own.

Look at that blonde guy. Look at him. He looks gay, icy, and cheekboned (this is the PERFECT fictional dude archetype for me). That book had to be mine.

Have you been watching Charlie Barley’s YouTube videos? Because they are perfect. Her sense of humour is just like… SO aligned with mine. I found her through her Stardew anti-capitalist playthrough series and then marathoned her Stardew Expanded series immediately and when I tell you I have to pause her videos almost every time because I’m laughing too hard to hear her, it is the truth. I’m so excited to see where she goes and everything she puts out, I will watch.

Which segues me nicely into…

I saw Charlie Barley play Cult of the Lamb and so I played Cult of the Lamb: a true story. I’ve seen conflicting opinions on whether Cult of the Lamb counts as a cosy game: otoh you’re taking care of your little flock of followers, farming food for them, building houses for them, and making your cult ground a nice place to be; otoh, it’s a roguelite fighting game and you can also choose to have a terrible cult full of sacrifices and cannibalism. So YMMV.

But for ME, it’s been a perfect game to curl up under a blanket with and play under the fairylights. The gameplay loop is so perfectly balanced between the fighting runs and the management back at your camp that progression feels so natural, and obviously I have been running a very soft cult full of giving my weird little followers their favourite snacks and making sure their beds are fully upgraded. Plus my lamb is totally going to marry the god of death. Don’t even worry about it.

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Next time I’ll either be sharing my favourite books of 2023, or, if that still feels too close to home, some of my most anticipated book releases of 2024!

Let me know what you’ve been loving so far this year in the comments - I’d love to know.

Happy new year!